Last Night My Bath Sang To Me

Ok, so there's a drought on. Glad there wasn't one when I lived in Brixton! The Bath (with a respectful capital B) in the Brixton flat is the one and only reason I moved in and dealt with Life on Coldharbour Lane for as long as I did.

Firstly, the Bathroom (with an equally respectful capital) was the size of most London bedsits (with lack of respectful capital). Secondly, it had stone flag floors, gloriously huge sash windows, nicely trendy fittings, three white walls and one wall of exposed-brick with fireplace.

Then, there was The Bath. It was magnificent! It sat squarely (or rather, ovally) in the middle of the room. It was Big. It was Deep. It was Wide. I used far more than my fair share of water. You could sit in it either way, as the taps came in over the side. So on a sunny day, you could lie facing the window, enjoying the blue sky (luckily the angle was low enough to avoid seeing the elevated railway), or on a nasty day, you could just as easily turn your back on the window, and look at the rest of the room. The lack of taps poking over one end also meant that sex-in-the-bath was a more comfortable option than usual...

So. Life on Coldharbour Lane eventually becoming unbearable, I had to move. And my current Herne Hill abode is way superior, in all but one aspect: the bath (no cap). The bathroom itself is very pretty, with nice tiles and pebbles and candles for decoration, but the bath.... It's very average. Size-wise it's OK - I'm short so am always happy to have my toes reach the other end so I can prop myself up when reading, but the sides aren't level so the only place to wineglasses and tea-cups is on the corner beside your head. But this space is already occupied by shampoo bottles and a plethora of other products, so all kinds of re-arrangements are needed for Complete Comfort in Bathing.And then there's the hot water issue. It is limited. And I like to use it all. And that's still not enough.

But last night, I had the most delicious experience. My bath sang to me! T'was a dark and stormy night... And as the wind blew, so the overflow pipe sang mournful, heart-rending tunes! And as the bath filled, so those melodious notes wandered the scale. I feel like the universe just treated me to my own Special Moment...

So come home, Herne Hill Bath! All is forgiven...


My Now Extraordinary Bath